A reading from the Book of Genesis:
1 And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech.
2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there.
3 And they said one to another, Go to, let us make plastic cups that can stack atop one another. And let us make them of many colors, lo, for that would be cool.
4 And they said, Go to, let us stack our cups to make a tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us put a duck upon the top, because ducks are pretty neat.
5 And SteelyKid came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded.
6 And SteelyKid said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and they have a duck that looks pretty neat.
7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech. And let us seize the duck, for lo, it would fit well in our mouth.
8 So SteelyKid threw down their tower and scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build with the stacking cups of many colors.
9 And lo, the duck did fit well in SteelyKid‘s mouth, and verily made small squeaking noises. And it was good.
(I know, I know, I’m going to Hell for this…)