I Know They Show Beer Commercials in Hell

It’s fall, which means that the major American sports are all ramping up (baseball is in its brief period of being interesting, the NFL is nearing the middle of its season, the NBA has just gotten underway, which means that real basketball will start soon). This also means that the major advertisers have rolled out the commercial that will be annoying the hell out of everybody for the next several months.

Sports are really the only place that I see commercials– I tend to watch sporting events live, but use the DVR to time-shift other programming, allowing me to fast-forward through the ads. This tends to make sports-themed commercials particularly grating, but there are two series of ads now running that are annoying above and beyond the usual. I can’t quite decide which I hate more, so this is a good topic for a poll:

Choose only one.

16 thoughts on “I Know They Show Beer Commercials in Hell

  1. Choose only one?

    This is like one of those situations where the mule starves to death, equidistant between two bales of hay and unable to choose. I can’t vote. If the fake conversation guys were to my left, the fake informercial guy to my right, and I had only one 16-ton weight, the only proper course of action would be to drop it on myself to end my misery.

  2. Definitely the Coors guys. Aren’t some of the coaches they’ve used in these spots, um, deceased? That adds a big creepiness factor to the overall brain-mushing stupidity of it.

  3. I chose the lesser of two evils, and it was a difficult choice. Is there even one good beer commercial? The Coors Light train, drinkability, too light/too heavy, Sam Adams, all bad. The only one I recal that even got a laugh was the Coors Light keg fridge commercial, only because the guy left his girlfriend off the list to get into the apartment. Everytime she says “Come on, really?”, I laugh and my wife gives me the look.

    I watch a lot of baseball, in case you hadn’t noticed.

  4. Wait, there are really people who hate the Coors guys more? They’re a minor irritation at best; compare to the fake pitchman, who makes me want to stab my new flatscreen.

  5. Those coors light commercials are so bad, but part of the awfulness is we’ve seen them a gazillion times for 2 years now (and i don’t think any of the coaches are dead yet).

    That said, another 2 years of the bud light commercials and I may take my tv into the bathtub with me.

  6. I’m Canadian, so I’m happy to say I haven’t seen any of these.

    I purely hate every Budweiser ad that doesn’t have a horse in it, but I purely hate EVERY Coors ad, so if you forced me to choose sight unseen I guess I’d have to go with Coors.

  7. Not only do I find sports on television to be deathly boring (I can’t keep track of the basketball court if I can’t see the whole thing, and why do they paid those idiots to yell at me?), but most ads reduce me to incoherent rage anyway.

    Mostly, the family only lets me watch DVDs these days. It improves their viewing experience tremendously.

  8. Well, I have to say I’d take great pleasure in shoving that grooler up the frigging pitchman’s ass. Sideways.

  9. OMG you’re USA-centric creeps, all of you!!!! Bear in mind the plight of the poor Europeans! You’re totally ignoring all our infuriating commercials to concentrate on your own problems!

    Also, this Brit got rid of her TV mostly as a cost-saving measure (the license fee is a hundred pounds+ I could spend on other things), so there needs to be a “too poor/tight to have a telly” option.

  10. compare to the fake pitchman
    A fake pitchman would be pitching fake items. They are actual items, and you can buy them here. So he is more like a real pitchman. And yes, I am a proud owner of a foozie!

  11. I try not to watch even sporting events live. Therefore I rarely watch any commercials, and don’t believe anyone who makes commercials should be violently punished. I actually feel sort of sorry for them, knowing they’ll be out of work in a few years at best.

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