Attention, Hollywood

Fred Clark has an idea for you:

Start with the housekeeping staff at a Manhattan hotel. They’ve just learned that their next contract includes no raise, but doubles the employee share of the cost of health benefits. The Norma Rae of this bunch — let’s say Jennifer Lopez* — convinces them to strike, but they have little leverage and she’s struggling to hold the line. These women can’t afford the new contract, but they can’t afford a lengthy strike either.

As it happens, this very same Manhattan hotel is the site of negotiations between the NFL Players Union and the owners. Mixed up in all that is a flashy, loudmouthed Chad Ochocinco-type — let’s say Will Smith — who has tweeted himself into controversy and the thick of this dispute by calling out the other professional athletes’ unions for not supporting the NFL players.

Because this is a movie, his Twitter-offensive works and he convinces a bunch of NBA, baseball and hockey stars to join him in a show of support for the NFL players. That gets us a string of cameo appearances by real-life star athletes, giving our movie its appeal to the lucrative young male audience Hollywood craves. Getting these young males to line up for this movie is a neat trick because, at its core, this isn’t a sports movie, it’s a romantic comedy.

Sure, getting all the necessary athlete cameos (and SportsCenter personalities, don’t forget them) would be a hassle. But still, it’s got to be cheaper than yet another goddamn comic book movie…

So, give Fred a call. You’ve proven many times over that you can do much, much worse.

2 thoughts on “Attention, Hollywood

  1. Comic Book Movies?!!!!! Even my son-in-law, a hard core graphic novel guy (they don’t say “comic books”) will say that those movies suck. He hasn’t had a good word about one since Hell-Boy. That said, Fred’s idea also sucks. Teenage boys are too smart to go to anything that looks like romance. Maybe he can make another gangster movie based on my relatives from South Boston (good guys and bad guys).

  2. joemac53@1:

    Teenage boys are too smart

    Having some experience as a teenage boy and much more experience in dealing with them in classroom situations, I believe I can safely say:


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